Coat from the hook
phone on vibrate
slipped it into my pocket
I just needed a chance
to clear my head
to not worry about contrast
To look at the sky
watch the stars wink
and not worry what they mean
To sip some coffee
no worries about the grind
still in the filter
Or the soy ink print
on the cup
which I will recycle
Emerging from the shop
this dot that’s me
on this rectangle
On the map
on my smart phone
aligned with satellites
Looking down
on this cobalt
and blue planet
This emerging sense
that if I miss dotting an i
that if I print illegibly
That I will grind
good and evil together
not contrasting them
I chance a look up
and the sky is clear
of cobalt clouds
Then with a wink of my eye
and my thumbs hooked
into my belt straps
I begin to vibrate
to align with the stars
and mean something
/ / /
This poem was written in response to Wordle 55 at The Sunday Whirl.
This means something, Richard. You’ve captured angst, reflection, and discovery. The modern era, merging with the meaning of life. This is one of your best. I LOVE it!
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Brenda, thank you so much. That means a lot coming from you. Thanks for those wordle words.
Richard
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Fascinating, fun, intriguing… I know I try to stay away from adjectives, but this poem is those things. The speaker’s personality slips through quietly until the end when he shakes off his philosophising.
I like the form with three short lines encompassing a thought, or action, per stanza.
margo
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Margo, thank you so much for your kind and thoughtful words.
Richard
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Three words–I LOVE THIS! These lines–
Emerging from the shop
this dot that’s me
on this rectangle
On the map
on my smart phone
aligned with satellites
so impersonal, and then shifting to the highly personal:
I begin to vibrate
to align with the stars
and mean something
gorgeous!
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Susan, thank you so much.
Richard
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Love it. And oh, for the time to do THIS:
“To look at the sky
watch the stars wink
and not worry what they mean”
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De, yes, if only I had the time to do that. Thanks.
Richard
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Richard, your character is well defined in this. I felt as if I were sitting in the room with him (you). Nicely whirled with the words.
Pamela
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Pamela, thank you. There’s a lot of me in that speaker.
Richard
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I love this. What a wonderful 2012 tech poem you have written. I love the narrator beginning to vibrate, morphing into the smart phone described earlier in the poem. Clever!!
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Mary, thank you so much for your thoughtful comments. Technology very much influenced this poem. Thanks for making that “vibrate” connection.
Richard
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Now I didn’t expect that ending… and I love it!
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Laurie, thank you. I hope it was a good unexpected ending.
Richard
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In our Saturday paper there was an article about how to find the stars by aligning them to the dippers…and not worrying about seeing the constellation pictures, because (especially with light pollution) it could be hard to imagine. And yet we try and fit the ‘dot’ of ourselves into the universe. I like how you did this with your verse.
My wordle for this week is here:
http://julesgemsandstuff.blogspot.com/2012/05/trade-winds-sunday-whirl-55.html
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Jules, thank you so much. I like how you connected the dots between that article and my poem. Thanks for sharing that with me.
Richard
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A lot to like, grinding together of good/evil with no contrast perhaps my favorite.
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Mark, thanks. Glad you like that line.
Richard
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I want to believe that every writer desperately wants to vibrate with meaning. Love the tumbling twirling movement of emotions you have achieved Richard. This one stands out. I am clapping.
Elizabeth
http://soulsmusic.wordpress.com/2012/05/06/still-possibilities/
PS Yes it was a fishing metaphor. When I get desperate for that afore mentioned vibration, I most often find myself writing about writing or fishing. Spent many hours engaged in both of those activities. They have a great deal in common.
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Elizabeth, thank you so much for your thoughtful reply. That first line – “I want to believe…” – is so true.
It was a good metaphor. I haven’t been fishing in years, but I see the connection between it and writing.
Richard
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Woohoo Richard, I could so identify with the speaker and I want to mean something. 🙂
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Irene, thanks so much.
Richard
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Mr. Walker, Mr. Wojtanik sends his thumbs up. Your work never fails, Richard.
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Walt, thank you so much. I appreciate the comment about not failing, especially as I’m a teacher.
Richard
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Beautiful, Richard. I loved this travel with you.
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Diane, thank you. Thanks for traveling with me.
Richard
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Really good poem. You captured that stressed feeling so well. And I loved the ending.
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Madeleine, thank you. It is stressful, isn’t it?
Richard
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Tied clearly into today’s world of non-stop connection. I am glad you wrote us a way out.
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Teri, thank you. The writing is definitely helping me find a way out.
Richard
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Re-sensing! Now that’s a neat turnaround.
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Barbara, thank you.
Richard
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Richard! I read this on my phone and have enjoyed the re-read here, several times. That second stanza resonates deep in me.
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Paula, thank you. And that second stanza definitely resonates deep in me as well. Glad you like that one.
Richard
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“:this dot that’s me
on this rectangle
On the map”
This portion really strikes me, Richard. I like the smallness it makes me feel. Great use of the words!!!
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Hannah, thank you. I appreciate your comment about “smallness”. That’s what I was going for, that sense of smallness and isolation in the midst of constant largeness and connection.
Richard
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Oh good, Richard, I’m glad to have picked up on your intention! Smiles
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